


I Dreamt The Pain Away

by TartanWriting



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-24
Updated: 2014-12-24
Packaged: 2018-03-03 08:07:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2844023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TartanWriting/pseuds/TartanWriting
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the celebrations at Skyhold, Lavellan returns to her chambers, only to get the closure she needed.<br/>Endgame spoilers!</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Dreamt The Pain Away

**Author's Note:**

> I honestly expected a scene like this at the end of the game. We're missing out on some serious closure.

Closing her bleary eyes tightly she rolled from her back onto her front, letting her forehead press against the mahogany of her door, behind which she's just taken refuge. The coldness of the wood burning against her bare still bruised flesh. The painful stings of pain finally prickled in her eyes. Noise drummed in her ears, she could only assume that despite her leave the festivities played on. Lavellan let out a sad laugh, or at least tried to. The battle was finished and won and yet here she was. Alone and crying. The noise that eventually escaped her chapped lips was nothing more than a weary cough. Pulling her head back from the cool wood, the elf tried to think. Come to terms with everything. Corypheus was dead. Destroyed was the breach and so was the elven orb. Solas...Solas was gone. 

With her body frail and bruised from the recent battle, she made an attempt to get upstairs. She could still hear drumming and pounding although now she suspected it was her own panic. The sound of her heart bursting, thudding against her ear drums. As she reached the top of the steps, the elf searched the room. Empty. Just the way she needed it. Her form fell limply on the bed and a pained sigh escaped her lips. All she could do was place blame. Surly the orb being destroyed was her fault? That's why Solas left. The whole time they'd been together she made promises of protecting elvhen culture and fixing the world. Yet, all she had to do was keep one artefact safe and she couldn't. 

Lavellan yelled out in anger gripping at the bed sheets as she released a painful sob. Why did she feel so empty? He left her. Twice. He took her vallaslin from her face and left her alone in the cold woods. He'd done it again, only the latter time he left with her heart. The battle was over and all she wanted was some answers and now she had nothing. How was she supposed to be happy?

"Do not cry, vhenan." The smooth and familiar voice startled her still. She didn't dare to hope that it could possibly be him. Ever so slowly, Lavellan looked up from the bed. Combing her blonde fringe from her face and then wiping the smeared eye make up from under each eye. What a fool she must have looked. She had never cried in front of any memeber of her inquisition. In times of pain she would excuse herself and weep where no one could see. It had made her weary of Cole. He saw the pain she let no one gaze upon. The fears and aches hidden so tightly beneath a mask of humour. Her thoughts recalled the day he spoke of her pain to Solas and Dorian. 'Barefaced, ashamed'... He wasn't wrong and yet to have people hear people hear her pangs. It made her lash out at the spirit. His face contorted into pain and confusion and whilst deep down Lavellan knew Cole only meant to help, neither herself, Dorian, Cole or Solas spoke of it again. 

Standing in front of the doors to her balcony was Solas. He made no step to move and Lavellan wondered how he could look so enchantingly handsome. The faint flickers from the fire lit his front, barely showing off his features as he stood with his back to a breathtaking view of stars. 

"Why are you here, ma sa'lath?" Lavellen choked out with a smile spreading across her lips. Despite her pain she could not be angry, she could not be hurt. She could only be relieved. 

"To beg your forgiveness." Solas replied cooly, finally stepping towards the inquisitor. "And explain if I can, vhenan." He finished, settling on the edge of the bed. 

Lavellan sat up on the bed, seating herself so close to Solas she could feel the cold from him. Another moment was needed for her to compose herself and look less disshelved than she had. "Solas, please. You've left me in the dark so long." To that a sad smile twitched on his lips. 

"I know and I am sorry." Solas stated, reaching out somewhat tenderly to rest his own calloused hands over Lavellan's. "I am not who or what you think I am, but please know that I do love you." 

Lavellan cocked a brow. The 'who' made some sense to her, but the 'what' didn't. Solas closed himself off, introverted himself from the world and the people in it. She knew he had many secrets to hide. He knew that she knew this. When she called him out on his solitude he had merely replied 'You saw more than most' and she believed him. 

"The orb was yours, wasn't it?" Lavellan whispered. The look on his face when he had found that shattered orb was that of a man who had lost everything. 

He looked surprised by her assumption, but a brief nod of the head confirmed it to be true. "What are you?" She asked in a hesitant and shakey voice, her hand slowly slipping away from his own and settling in her own lap. The pain on his face made her heart clench. 

"Your people would call me Fen'harel." He replied steadily. His blue eyes scanning her face for a reaction. What he expected of her she could not know. She hardly knew how to react her self. The words wrang in her ears but piecing them together made little sense. Yet it made all the sense in the world. This man, this being. The trickster god of rebellion and betrayal. He certainly was good at tricking her into loving him. 

A dull laugh escaped Lavellan's lips. That was the only reaction she could form. Solas looked a mixture of annoyed, confused and ever so slightly amused.  
"I believe you!" Lavellan replied holding her hands up to the man just to assure him.His face however remained the same combination of confusion. She did believe him, she just couldn't comprehend the situation and a nervous laugh was her initial reaction. 

"It's just..." Lavellan breathed, regaining some of her composure. "Are you. Are you telling me--" 

"Yes, I am the dread wolf and I am the reason the breach was formed. The reason you bare that anchor and I--" Solas began listing off.

"--That I fucked a god?" Lavellan finished. 

Solas looked exasperated. She watched him with amusement, pushing down the laugh that was bubbling in her throat, awaiting his confirmation. Solas' hands went to his face covering it with both palms as he let out a sigh and then a chuckle. 

"I can't believ--just. Yes, in a sense." Solas answered with light amusement. Perhaps she wasn't coming to terms with it all too well. Truth was that she loved Solas. She fell for every part of him, from the moment he said 'Was that a serious question' she was attracted to him. Reaching with a cool hand, she cupped the man's face. Solas leaned into the touch and Lavellan caressed his cheek with her thumb. 

"It is like I said when we spoke of the well of sorrows. I believe them. Us. Not to be gods but something else entirely. As I have told Cole I am not a spirit." Solas explained, reaching up with his own hand to cover Lavellan's once more. "Nor am I just an elf."

"Ma emma lath." Lavellan whispered and leaned in tenderly. Gently brushing her own lips against Solas'. It was not a kiss of passion and need, it was one of intimacy and love.  
After hours of talking about everything from Arlathan to Corypheus, Lavellan fell asleep in Solas' embrace. Only to awaken alone on the her bed. Her eyes shifted to the balcony doors that were closed, locked. The bed was just as she remembered it before she broke down last night into the crumpled sheets. It was just a dream. She had fallen asleep and dreamt of him. That was only the explanation. 

In what world would a god fall in love with her?


End file.
